You Create Your World
So You Create Your thoughts are setting the stage for things to come. As you think, so you create. If you believe your dreams are attainable, so you create. If you anticipate failure, so you create. If you imagine being smiled at tomorrow, so you create. If you predict rejection, so you create. If you […]
July 4th for Your Spirit
“The deeper human nature needs to breathe the precious air of liberty.” —Dalai Lama We’re hard-wired to seek freedom, according to Muriel James. In her book, Perspectives in Transactional Analysis, she writes: The urge to be free is closely related to the urge to live. Freedom is the first struggle for life. It starts […]
Choose to Bloom
Spring. The sun. The warm air. Life blooming. With the awakening earth, my soul is refreshed. Like the flowers that push through the hard ground, I too am now open to possibility. No one chooses how I bloom but me! —Kim Thompson I just love that poem! How does it speak to […]
Two to Tango
Passivity invites the other person to take a power position. Maya and Jarel have been dancing the same dance step—or style of relating—for years. He dominates and she obediently yields. She’s tired of it. Not long ago, she was ready to walk out the door, but right at that point he made a dramatic change . […]
You’re Bigger Than You Think
There’s a psychological term I want to introduce you to. You may already know it; the word is “schema” and it means a deeply ingrained belief or impression about ourselves and the world around us. Schemas take root at an early age as a result of what we experience in life. Certain key people […]
Love Can’t Thrive in a Cage
“If you really love me, you’ll be true to yourself!” Say that to your partner and watch their jaw drop to the floor. Why? Because we usually get the opposite message: “If you really love me, you’ll do what I want. You’ll do back flips—on the ceiling!—to please me.” Has anyone ever tried to […]
Meet Your Roommate
Suppose you had a roommate who constantly scrutinized and critiqued your every move starting with the moment you got out of bed: “You should have gotten up earlier. Are you ignoring today’s schedule? Your hair’s a mess . . . as usual. Don’t forget to contact Jonathan today. He expects a call, you know. […]
Seek Sunlight
“I felt like a cage was around me when I was with John. I wasn’t me. I was afraid to be me. I was always nervous about doing the wrong thing and setting him off.” Those words were spoken by my client, Marta, who finally left her husband because he’s an alcoholic—he got violent. Click […]
Avoid the Muck and Guck
I found a perfect piece of advice for those of us who try to fix someone else’s distorted thinking. It’s an old Russian proverb that says: “Don’t drive a car straight down a crooked road.” Easier said than done, especially if we’re the target of someone’s erroneous accusations. At those times, it’s extremely difficult […]
Don’t Settle for a Beige Life
When we follow our dreams, we take up residence in a much larger part of ourselves . . . our soul. “Be silently drawn by the stronger pull of what you really love.” – Rumi That line could apply to many circumstances. It can apply to a person, an activity, a career or a dream […]