Poke the Tiger
“I pray every night that God will take my life.” Vince, 56, apparently would rather die than leave a life-sucking relationship. He’s been with his wife, Gail, for eight years. And for the bulk of that time he’s been unhappy, merely enduring his existence instead of living. In our counseling session, he depicted Gail as […]
Love Shouldn’t be a Prison, and True Love Isn’t
Since this is the month we celebrate Valentine’s Day, I thought I’d dust off one of my favorites from several years ago that seemed to resonate with many people. Even if you’ve been following me from the beginning, this one’s worth a second look: One thing that assures a long-lasting relationship is kindness—each partner treating the […]
Listen to Your Grumpy Self
“I was grumpy when I got up and then I took it out on my kids,” Lori said. “I was just lazy and didn’t want to get up.” Lori had a good reason for wanting to stay in bed a little bit longer. She had worked late the night before. She needed the rest. But something […]
Cultivate Self-Compassion
“If your compassion does not include yourself, it is incomplete.” […]
Call it Parent Power!
Laura’s petrified that her teenage daughter may be headed down a dangerous path. While she and Kaitlyn sat across from each other in my office, Laura rattled off her string of concerns. Among her worries were slipping grades, Kaitlin’s recent choice of friends—some have been in trouble with the law—and a controlling boyfriend who habitually puts […]
Love’s Magic
The heart is a weapon of mass construction. A light bulb finally turned on in my head one day. It was the wiser part of me saying: Okay, Salee, if you’re brilliant enough to know something isn’t right, then you should be brilliant enough to do something about it. In other words: Speak up! I’ve learned […]
The Truth about Tears
“Only strong people allow themselves to feel pain.” –Heather, 16 If you haven’t watched the movie Inside Out, drop everything and head for a theater immediately! The story takes place inside the head of 11-year-old Riley, where five key characters reside—all representing her main emotions: Joy, Fear, Disgust, Anger, and Sadness. The story carries a […]
I Want a Silverback Father!
I’m certain we could learn a lot from silverback gorillas. Not about grooming habits, but about the way they care for their young. The movie Instinct stars Anthony Hopkins as an anthropologist who lives among a community of gorillas for two years. He starts out as a detached observer, but it isn’t long before they […]
Missing Sasha
Sadly, Carrie’s four legged friend passed away. When she told me about it a day later, she struggled hard to fight back the tears. She was surprised to be so affected. After all, it was just a dog, right? Wrong. Psychological experts are increasingly acknowledging the importance of pets in our lives. Indeed, they provide […]
Love Who You Are
As I contemplated jumping into this enormous project, I was grateful to get the following comment from a reader: “Having compassion for ourselves and letting go of unrealistic expectations is a life long journey. A few simple steps to help us move forward would be helpful.” —Judith That sounded to me like a mighty […]