Say Good-bye to Bullies
Don’t put up with bullying just because it’s been your habit since day one and is therefore insanely comfortable. That was my advice to Nicole who endures verbal abuse from her boss on a regular basis. She’s always belittling her in front of the other employees. For example, she’ll blast her for missing deadlines and […]
Unexpected Gift
“I don’t take responsibility for what’s going on in your head.” That’s what Gordon wishes he had said when his girlfriend completely misinterpreted him . . . again. It all started when she called to tell him how bored and miserable she was at work. According to the work schedule, she had the day off, […]
Don’t Take the Bait
When Jim returned home from his Saturday fishing trip, his wife, Marlene, was withdrawn—cold as ice. Alas, the all too familiar silent treatment had set in. He asked Marlene if there was a problem. With her head turned away, she murmured a mere, “No.” Remaining calm and unaffected, he said, “Well, you’re not acting as […]
You Really Do Know What’s True
Proceeding wisely through life requires a sharply focused awareness of our emotions. Being blind to them handicaps our ability to take effective action in any given situation. Let’s say, as a small child, you hear a loud noise. Instinctively, you place your hands over your ears. Then you’re told, “It’s not too loud.” Let’s say […]
Feed the Lightness
“The evil of our time is the loss of consciousness of evil.” ~Krishnamurti A Wrinkle in Time, a recently released movie based on the book by Madeleine L’Engle, is a magical story about good winning over evil. I found the movie to be a breath of fresh air, providing an element of hope at a […]
Parenting Gumby-Style
Confining adolescents to the basement can be a deliciously tempting idea at times. Melissa feels she’s losing control of Carly, her 12-year-old daughter. Of greater concern: She fears she might be losing her altogether. “We used to be so tight,” Melissa said in our counseling session. “My worst nightmare has been that Carly would someday […]
The Seduction of Security
Oh, the soul-numbing effect of living within the confines of the familiar! This was the theme that 41-year-old Angie and I discussed in our counseling session. She came to me wanting help with her depression. “I just can’t seem to shake this no matter what I tell myself,” she said with a sigh. Angie described her […]
My Girlfriend Is a Bully
Avoid people who don’t care what they do to you. Picture a large, ugly, brutish ogre who frequently pummels people over the head with a club. More than likely, he’ll be catered to because doing so will make things a trillion times more pleasant than the alternative. Standing up to him will have the same […]
Nope … the Ring Won’t Change Him
Steer clear of people who fail to take an honest look at themselves. Do you really want to be with a person who can’t be reasoned with, who doesn’t take an honest look in the mirror, and who flies into a rage at the mere drop of a hat? That was the question I asked […]
She Wasn’t Being Silly
Paralyzed with fear, Kathleen stopped suddenly in her tracks. The trail she was hiking with her husband, Zach, had come to an unexpected fork. They were assured, back at the visitors center, that all trails would be clearly marked. For the most part, that proved to be true, but definitely not now. Zach motioned to the […]