Not long ago, a client—in her 40s—wowed me with this:
“Rebellion, at any age, is a means of repositioning ourselves with our parents.”
I can only agree. I’ve come to see that the good side of rebellion is that it allows us to break into new horizons of empowerment—to transcend existing limits. Another client, Sonya, further substantiated that point. She was telling me how much she appreciates the grief she once caused her parents especially now that she has teenagers of her own. Hair pulling time! So she did the only honorable thing and apologized to her mother :-).
I was both amazed and touched by what her mother had to say: “Don’t give it a second thought. It just meant you were readying yourself for leaving the nest.”
Rebellion isn’t really a war waged against our parents. It’s a war waged against our childlike attachment to them—our littleness in their presence.
Acts of rebellion are important dramas, essential for clearing the way for a more mature you—little you giving way to bigger you.